Friday, February 24, 2012

What Men mean to say

"I'M GOING FISHING" Means: "I'm going to drink myself
dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick
in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."

"IT'S A GUY THING" Means: "There is no rational
thought pattern connected with it, and you have no
chance at all of making it logical."

"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Means: "Why isn't dinner
already on the table?"

"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR" Means:
Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.

"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN" Means:
"I have no idea how it works."

"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE
THINGS ON MY MIND." Means: "I was wondering if that
redhead over there is wearing a bra."

"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU ARE WORKING TOO
HARD." Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."

"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR." Means: "Are you still
talking?"

"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?" Means: "What did you
catch me at?"

"I HEARD YOU." Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you
just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough
so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."

"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC." Means: ""Please don't try on one
more outfit, I'm starving."

"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."

"YES, I LOVE YOUR SPINACH CASSEROLE." Means: "Real
men love beer and boobs. Why can't you understand that?"